Corr blimey! ATMs offer cockney navigation
by Stevie Smith - Aug 25 2009, 15:45
Taking a well earned 'George Best' from inside their ATMs. Image: celesteh/Flickr.
If there’s one thing we Brits dislike about visiting American tourists, it’s their woeful attempts at crafting ‘corr blimey cock-a-nee’ accents. Those visitors who do insist on taking their cues from Dick Van Dyke’s performance in Mary Poppins can now work on improving their mockney through ATM machines spread across East London.
While initially we couldn’t ‘Adam and Eve it’ (believe it), sharp-suited Guy Richie fans seeking a little legal ‘sausage and mash’ (cash) from ATM outlets operated by Bank Machine can now choose the cockney language option after inserting their card and punching in their personal ‘Huckleberry Finn’ (PIN).
While those in-the-know are likely to see the cockney option as a unique and entertaining way to withdraw some money or check an account balance, misreading the on-screen London slang and continually selecting incorrect options could lead into a maze of frustration for more easily flummoxed users.
The Associated Press reports that one such customer, charity worker Slaney Wright (32), visibly tensed when trying to navigate through an ATM’s cockney rhyming slang selections, eventually giving up and cancelling her attempted transaction.
However, in the main, it would appear interacting in cockney via the participating ATM Charlie Sheens (screens) is certainly putting a smile on the faces of most (stereotypically miserable) Londoners and other passing users.
By way of preparation, some of the messages displayed on the Bank Machine ATMs include rhyming slang such as ‘some moolah for ya sky rocket’ (some cash for your pocket), reading your ‘bladder of lard’ (reading your card), and ‘bees and honey’ (money).
Bank Machine, which operates some 2,500 ATMs throughout the UK, plans to expand its regional language options to include specific dialects such as Brummie (Birmingham), Geordie (Newcastle), and Scouse (Liverpool).
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